A New Home – A New Chapter – A Wobbly do

A New Home –

A New Chapter and I Throw a Bit of a Wobbler

This weekend I have quietly gone ‘Oh *insert swear word that rhymes with duck* What have we done?!’ with reference to our newly purchased, much in need of pulling in bits and re-jigging – house.  I’m not sure if ‘throwing a wobbler’ is a universal phrase, but I’m fairly sure it’s a universal feeling – it’s the sensation you get when your heart suddenly tries to jump out of your mouth and then falls at a hundred miles an hour into the soles of your feet, and from my own experience, it makes me swear quietly in my head – lots.

You see, Horace and I got the keys for our new house last weekend and we are now on with doing up two houses and a garden.  Our present house needs renovating so we can put it up for rent, our new house needs renovating so it stops smelling of three huge stinky labradors and  has a kitchen that Horace doesn’t bang his head on (it has a ridiculously low ceiling), along with a million other alterations.  These alterations are not minor.  I am rubbish at DIY.  Horace is very good at computers, not DIY either.  Oh *insert word that rhymes with git*!

Mind you, I’m a great believer in ‘Slowly, slowly, catchy monkey!’ as a rule to live by and I’m sure we’ll get there in the end.  It will be beautiful, we will have a kitchen extension that Horace can walk around in without giving himself concussion; we will have a garden that doesn’t have 2 manky henhuts (and no hens) and 1 rotted, collapsed henhut; we will dispose of a ton of old awful useless ex-window fittings with lethal 4 inch nails sticking out of them; we will have a lawn, raised beds, a tree house for the kids, a trampoline…….and a nervous breakdown.  Yep, probably a nervous breakdown too. *insert word that sounds like sugar, except add a ‘b’ at the start and add an extra ‘g’ and an ‘er’.

This monkey is going to take some catching…..


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